Now that I've almost finished tweeting the Old Testament (now with 68% more humor!), it's time to share some of the shortcuts I've learned. So here is every prophetic book in seven words or less. I'm just sure that this will revolutionize theological education.
How would we sum up the other books of the Bible in seven words or less? And . . . GO!
Isaiah: Exile is coming, people. Buh. Bye.
Jeremiah: G divorces Israel but is clinically depressed. ☹
Ezekiel: Too freaky to describe in seven words.
Daniel: When facing lions, always dream of apocalypse.
Hosea: G: “Go marry a prostitute. Good luck!”
Joel: Locusts aren’t the end of the world.
Amos: Rich people got no reason to live.
Obadiah: Damn those damned Edomites. Dammit!
Jonah: Go preach the gospel now, you slacker.
Micah: Stop screwing the poor. Immediately.
Nahum: You’re going down, Ninevah, and we’re stoked.
Habakkuk: G takes calls from disgruntled customer.
Zephaniah: God’s coming and is he ever pissed.
Haggai: Build the temple! Build the temple now!
Zechariah: What Haggai said, but with trippier visions.
Malachi: God, we’re hauling your ass to court.
The image of a cheater's hand was provided by Shutterstock.com. The hand was provided by God.
Logic Window | May 13, 2012 | 12:20am
We can prove God doesn’t exist at http://logicwindow.wordpress.com
The logic is so simple, if the creator or God exists and he gave freewill to all criminals to mess up our lives, whereas parents will never allow their own children to do anything close to that. Then these parents are wiser and humane than the creator or God. No we aren’t atheist, just because somebody don’t believe in God doesn’t he or she should turn into atheist. We strictly condemn atheism and creationism, both are dangerous perceptions to mankind.